"The Relay" Online Newsletter
August 2025 Issue

This is the monthly online newsletter for the car club council. All car hobbyist events are listed on this site under "Calendar." Just click on the link above to view the list of car shows and other activities.

President's Message

Many thanks to those who came out to support the first July 4th Trailways Cruise-In in Petersburg. It was the first time Washington Street had been shut down for an event like this. It turned out to be a big success with well over 100 vehicles participating. The City of Petersburg didn't expect that many. The mayor, city council and Petersburg employees and residents were very happy with the turnout and they have asked that there be another July 4th Trailways Cruise-In next year.

I met with Faris, owner of the Griffin Lounge, after the event. We discussed closing off Washington from Jefferson to Sycamore. This will place the cruise-in vehicles on Washington. This year we have to overflow into adjacent parking lots. We also plan to have designed parking for spectators and the Dollar General on Adams has said their lot can be used to spectators. Opening up to Sycamore will give us more parking for everyone. Faris wants to add some more awards including shortest distance (along with longest distance), youngest driver, oldest driver and keep the best of show and staff pick. He may even add more awards.

We are looking forward to next July 4th for another great event. I also met with the show committee after the Pamplin Park Breakthrough Show. Three of the food vendors sold out during the show. There were 137 vehicles and we raised over $8700 for the park. We talked about adding more classes and more trophies, working on more goody bag items and more auto-related silent auction items. There is an article below about the Park. Pamplin Park is going through some changes to insure the park is funded and will continue for decades. We plan to have the show next year on May 9th.

Our August meeting will be at the same location as the April meeting. I had a request to go there again. I hope you can attend. The July 4th event and the Breakthrough Show and other topics will be discussed. Hopefully you can make it.

Did you know August 5th is always "Work Like a Dog Day"? Do you work harder and longer hours than anyone you know? Are you a workaholic? If you answered yes to either or both of these questions, then you will appreciate Work Like a Dog Day. This August 5 holiday recognizes, honors, and appreciates the hardest working among us. After all, our jobs are tough, and somebody has to do the work while the rest of us take another coffee break.

Next Meeting

The next meeting will be Monday, August 25th at 6:30 PM at Dolce Vita, 2401 Colony Crossing Place, Midlothian, VA, 23112, (804) 639-7411. They have a meeting room that we will use. Website with menu: dolcevitamidlothian.com.

Trailways Classic Cruise-In on July 4th
See all the photos at Album - opens to a new window

Car Hobbyist News

National Report

The EPA is not restrained by money - in other words if the EPA thinks something needs to be done then there is no limit to the amount of money that can be spent to get it done. But that is about to change. The Epoch Times reports:

The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) is seeking to repeal the basis for its ability to regulate the U.S. economy in the name of fighting climate change, Administrator Lee Zeldin confirmed on July 23.

“The EPA has sent to the Office of Management and Budget a proposed rule to repeal the 2009 endangerment finding from the Obama EPA,” Zeldin told Newsmax. The finding stated that emissions of carbon dioxide and other greenhouse gases from vehicles would contribute to pollution that threatened public health.

According to the EPA’s website, two findings were signed in December 2009 under a section of the Clean Air Act. The first said “current and projected concentrations” of six well-mixed greenhouse gases, including carbon dioxide, methane, and nitrous oxide, in the atmosphere threatened public health and welfare. The second found that the combined emissions from new motor vehicles and new motor vehicle engines contributed to greenhouse gas pollution.

“These findings do not themselves impose any requirements on industry or other entities,” the EPA stated. ”However, this action was a prerequisite for implementing greenhouse gas emissions standards for vehicles and other sectors.”

Zeldin said that since the finding, there had been “trillions” of dollars’ worth of regulations, from tailpipe emissions to electric vehicle mandates. He criticized the left for not talking about many reasons why carbon dioxide is essential to life on earth.

“The left might say, and in many cases they do, that there’s a choice, a binary choice: You can either protect the environment or grow the economy,” he said. “The Trump EPA rejects that. We choose both. We believe that you can protect the environment and grow the economy. That’s very important. That’s what the American public voted for, and that’s what they demanded when they went to the polls last fall.”"

The EPA is already relaxing rules from previous administrations. Plus the EV mandate is gone and so is tax payer funding for EV tax credits. The country is moving in the right direction on the EVs. You have free choice to buy whatever you want. And what do the people want? About 79% of new vehicle sales are for trucks and SUVs. EV sales - especially Tesla sales - have come down. Jaguar went all electric and sales have pummeled.

State Report

In Virginia the November election is coming and a lot of people are going to be watching. This is going to be one of the biggest state elections ever because it will determine the direction of the state. Will we accept what is happening with the Trump administration or buck it and go progressive.

From The Thomas Jefferson Institute for Public Policy newsletter: While reduced energy supply and growing demand are pushing up utility prices, the progressive left is pushing for even greater price increases by calling for Virginia to get back in the tax and spend Regional Greenhouse Gas Initiative (RGGI), and scaring people with exaggerated claims about weather events – like blaming flooding on global warming (when just two years ago the lack of rain was being blamed on global warming). With Virginia facing a massive energy crisis driving our business into a deep hole and utility bills headed higher and higher, the left votes to keep digging.

Abigail Spanberger has clearly opted to not take TJI’s advice to prove she is a centrist, and instead has embraced almost every expensive job killing progressive proposal vetoed by Governor Youngkin during his administration, including increasing the minimum wage to $15, forcing union labor and union rates on large government projects through Project Labor Agreements, supporting the creation of massive new entitlements for Paid Family and Medical Leave, paid sick leave, child care, and housing. Hold on to your wallets! CNBC -- be ready to lower Virginia's ranking should these policies become law.

If you want higher gas taxes and prices and you want to bring back RGGI and an EV mandate for 2035 you know who to vote for. People should vote their wallets. This is a battle for our rights and the future of our state. We must keep that in mind when we cast our vote in November.

EPA Slashes 23 Percent of Its Workforce, Eliminating Scientific Research Arm

From The Epoch Times
The Environmental Protection Agency said it plans to create a new office that will allow EPA to prioritize research and science ‘more than ever before.’

The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) announced on July 18 that it will cut about 23 percent of its workforce and eliminate its research and development office as part of the agency’s restructuring effort.

The agency stated that it expects its workforce to shrink from 16,155 employees to 12,448, noting that many have opted to resign through voluntary early retirement and a deferred resignation program.

The layoffs will affect the Research and Development Office, according to the EPA’s statement. The agency said the restructuring effort is expected to help it save about $748.8 million after completion.

The EPA said it plans to create an Applied Science and Environmental Solutions Office that will enable it to focus on research and science “more than ever before,” placing those functions “at the forefront of rulemakings and technical assistance to states.”

EPA Administrator Lee Zeldin said the reorganization is intended to ensure the agency is “better equipped than ever“ to deliver on its ”core mission of protecting human health and the environment while Powering the Great American Comeback” under the Trump administration.

“This reduction in force will ensure we can better fulfill that mission while being responsible stewards of your hard-earned tax dollars,” he said.

The Office of Research and Development functions as the EPA’s scientific research arm, according to the agency’s website. The office carries out “leading-edge research” that “informs agency decisions and supports the emerging needs of EPA stakeholders, including the agency’s state, tribal, and community partners,” it states.

Critics said cutting the office’s workforce will affect the EPA’s ability to respond to those risks properly.

Rep. Valerie Foushee (D-N.C.) said on March 18 that the office is “vital to understanding and addressing environmental risks.” “The Trump Administration’s plan to dissolve the EPA’s Office of Research and Development and lay-off over 1,000 scientists is yet another step in their scheme to fully gut this agency,” Foushee said.

The EPA had previously announced that it planned to enhance its scientific and research efforts within program offices to address its “statutory obligations and mission essential functions,” particularly within its air, water, and chemical offices, according to a statement.

The announcement followed the Supreme Court’s decision on July 8 to lift a lower court ruling that had blocked the Trump administration from proceeding with mass layoffs of federal workers and an overhaul of federal agencies. Aside from the EPA, the State Department has also announced plans to proceed with restructuring efforts following the Supreme Court ruling. State Department spokesperson Tammy Bruce said on July 10 that the reorganization plan is now “moving into implementation” but declined to provide a specific timeline for when layoffs will occur.

John Robson: The Case Against Photo Radar

From The Epoch Times
It’s been 25 years since my younger and more careless self got a speeding ticket. Or at least it had been until I suddenly got five in rapid succession across Ontario, all from photo radar, all for driving normally. I’m fighting them all as a gross breach of the social contract and the rule of law. And you should too.

Wait, you may cry. Don’t I deserve all those tickets? Doesn’t the law say that if the speed limit is 50 km per hour, you can’t go faster without risking punishment? Not quite. Rather, the law is what everyone knows it to be.

As philosophers going back to John Locke have explained across the centuries, the rule of law means “a standing rule to live by, common to every one of that society, and made by the legislative power erected in it.” And every driver knows the standing rule for Canada’s roads is that a human police officer won’t give you a ticket for going just slightly over the speed limit, unless you are weaving around, smoking a joint, texting or engaging in some other dangerous activity. We all get some leeway, at least in good weather.

Unfortunately, once governments began smelling an opportunity to grab some of the cash sitting pointlessly in our wallets, that time-honoured rule went out the lens with their ticket-dispensing Robocops.

Alberta was a surprising early adopter of photo radar, with its first device installed in 1987. More recently, it earned for itself the title of Canada’s most one-eyed-highwayman-ridden province, with 2,400 of the wretched things raking in $171 million in 2022. One single digital Dick-Turpin-meets-the-Sheriff-of-Nottingham in Edmonton fired off 52,558 tickets a year. Which so infuriated Albertans that the provincial transportation minister finally vowed to “kill the photo radar cash cow.” The result has been a promised 70 percent reduction in the devices.

Cash cow. There’s the rub. Promoters of speed cameras always preen about safety; one notice from rapacious Wellington County in Ontario, where five newly installed cameras promptly ticketed seven percent of all drivers, hollered “SLOW DOWN! SAVE A LIFE.” But they are lying.

Driving slightly over the limit on a four-lane street in broad daylight endangers nobody. Except now you, because you’re the cash cow. And whether we all spontaneously quote John Locke or not, virtually everyone senses in their gut that there’s something dishonest, unfair, and even dangerous about this misuse of language and law enforcement resources.

We the public don’t object to enforcement of laws including traffic laws. If any normal person is pulled over by a live police officer in whose judgement our speed, or speed plus other less tangible things, creates public danger, we blush, fess up, and pay up. We don’t even mind photo radar nabbing stunt-driving speed demons. But if you’d been sitting at that Edmonton intersection (Baseline Road and 17th Street) with your own radar gun watching traffic, how many of those 52,558 vehicles do you suppose you’d have jumped up and gone “Whoa nelly, dude, slow down!” or “Don’t you know what a red light is?”

When I say everybody knows, I mean everybody. Do you think cops, traffic court Solons, or municipal councillors drive at or below the posted limit to work, shop, or play? Of course not. Yet they sit there sanctimoniously plotting. In the case of Waterloo Region, in southwestern Ontario, the plan is to ramp up speed camera tickets from the current 70,000 to 875,000 tickets a year by 2029, which works out to more than one per ticket per driver annually. And not because their inhabitants are maniacal scofflaws, but because in the spirit of Bad King John these authorities have found a way to tax you without representation.

If you held a referendum asking whether posted speed limits should be ruthlessly enforced on everyone the result, I am confident, would be massively against. If you asked whether they should be raised significantly then enforced rigorously, it might be different. But the point is, we haven’t been asked. Governments just fell in love with the lucre they could extract and began putting them everywhere. And if you contest the tickets, the conviction rate would have embarrassed Joseph Stalin.

Oh, and in Ontario they increase the fine if you presume to insist on your day in court. They say it’s not meant as a deterrent, but I say try lowering the fine for anyone who fights and loses and see if incentives matter. I say it’s not just financially dangerous, but socially and politically dangerous as well. As famed 19th century writer Alexis de Tocqueville once warned, governments that succeed in smothering independence of spirit with petty regulations will eventually turn their populace into sheep, surly, or just depressed. And self-government cannot be sustained by sheep.

On the bright side, nearly everywhere this nasty experiment has been tried, from Texas to Ontario under Bob Rae, the public managed to put a stop to it, at least temporarily.

So far my efforts to contest these tickets have been met with surprising contempt about my arguments regarding the Charter of Rights and Freedoms and its promise of “fundamental justice.” As my quest to get a fair hearing in court continues, readers outside of Alberta should be warned that they too could soon be plundered for driving normally under the guise of public safety, by governments so chronically unable to manage their own finances that they raid yours.

My advice: don’t let them do it to you. Fight it in the public arena, in the voting booth, and yes, in the courts. They’ll convict you, of course. But if their administrative costs exceed the booty, they’ll eventually stop.

John Robson is an Ottawa-based journalist, historian, and documentary-film maker. The longer, original version of this story first appeared at C2CJournal.ca

10th Annual Street Dreams Cruisers Car & Truck Show - July 12
See all the photos at Album - opens to a new window.

Meme Time

Advice to EV owners: Floods

From: Self Reliance Central
Ironically, EV fires require A LOT more water to extinguish. Tesla’s First Responders Guide recommends 3,000 to 8,000 gallons of water on hand to put out a Tesla fire. Some fires have needed 30,000 gallons of water to extinguish. Basically, firefighters have to do whatever it takes to cool down the battery, and that’s really hard to do with so much energy densely packed into the pack. Once the fire appears fully extinguished, there’s a chance it could still flare up, even days later. Towing services and junkyards are advised to park damaged electric vehicles at least 50 feet from other vehicles in the yard. As EVs become more popular, that might not be feasible in just a few years.

If your EV has been flooded take care.

EV battery fire risk
1. EV safety systems and battery packs are designed to be safe in water, even if fully submerged.

2. However, EVs that have been submerged in water, particularly salt water, may have a higher potential risk of experiencing a battery short circuit, which may result in a battery fire.

Removal and towing
1. Once flood waters have subsided and if there are no signs of fire or no exposed HV cables and components are observed, contact your EV manufacturer for advice on removal and towing.

2. If hiring a towing company to move your EV, ensure they’ve read the manufacturer emergency response guide to determine exactly how to tow the EV to reduce risk.

3. It’s a good idea for EVs that have been submerged to be stored at least 15m from other vehicles in a tow yard, in the unlikely event the battery catches fire later.

Jewels Found On Ebay

Here are a couple of hot finds from Ebay Motors.

eBay item number: 127176388627
$12,000 Buy It Now
eBay description: Purchased from Larry's Mustang in Moulton, Alabama to use on a 69 or 70 coupe to convert it to a fastback. I have sold both coupes that I had planned to use it on, so I'm selling the fastback conversion roof. This roof came from a 70 Mach 1, which will work on the 69 or 70 models. Local pickup only. Located in central Alabama 8 miles from Mercedes Benz USA plant, 12 miles from I-59/I-20. 30 minutes from I-65. 30 Minutes from Birmingham, 30 Minutes from Tuscaloosa, and 30 minutes from Hoover. Please message for more photos or specifics.

Well - we are sorry that this guy purchased the roof off a fastback Mustang that looks like it was beat on with a sledge hammer. He places the ad in the cars and trucks for sale section, not parts. This piece of metal needs to go to the recycler.

Next up is a "project".

eBay item number: 205595727476
$28,500.00
eBay description: 67 Fastback A code project - for sale Very solid project - California built car. High spec car from factory with deluxe interior,fold down rear seat,tilt column,AC, Power steering and power disc brakes. Comes with a 289 V8 and C4 automatic gearbox. Mostly complete interior - front seats have recently been reupholstered at a cost of over $500. Frame rails are good, rockers are good,someone modified the transmission tunnel at one point but I have an OEM piece to fix that. Overall, it’s a very solid car and above-average for being un restored. All glass is present Sold with a GA registration. Vin is in the passenger side apron and door tag

You can tell from the photo that this car is in a junkyard. It has been stripped of most of its parts yet the seller wants $28,500 for it. There are a lot of cars and trucks you can buy for that money that run, drive and have shiny paint. It's sold on a registration (Georgia is not a title state with old vehicles). I wish anyone luck that thinks they can walk into a DMV with just a registration card and get a title (depends on who's working the counter that day). $500 to redo two bucket seats for this car - why? I don't think that should have been the first thing "fixed".

eBay item number: 405598993130
$800.00 or Best Offer
eBay description: 1961 Chevrolet Corvair Coupe. Parts car or ambitious project. Mostly Complete as shown in pictures. Some rust as shown. Mechanical condition unknown, but appears to be mechanically complete. Sold as-is with a bill of sale only. No title. Off the road since the early 1980s and stored on a farm. New tires, rolls and steers. Located in Ojai, CA 93023 approx 90 mins North of Los Angeles. I can assist with shipping arrangements.

Looks like someone tossed a brick at most of the glass. Metal is just a little rusty. I doubt even a metal wizard could fix that hood/trunk lid. Seller says it was stored on a farm and it looks like it had company from other vehicles no one else wanted. There were no photos of the engine for some reason. And the cherry on top is no title - so this is not a project but good for parts only - if you can find anything usable.

Marjorie Taylor Greene to Introduce Bill Prohibiting ‘Weather Modification’: ‘Will Be a Felony Offense’

From Breitbart
Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) revealed that she was introducing a bill to prohibit the use of “weather modification” or geoengineering to change weather conditions, temperature, or sunlight intensity.

In a post on X, Greene explained that she had been “researching weather modification” and had been working with the legislative counsel for several months regarding the bill. Greene continued to express that no person, company, or government should be able to “modify our weather by any means possible.”

“I am introducing a bill that prohibits the injection, release, or dispersion of chemicals or substances into the atmosphere for the express purpose of altering weather, temperature, climate, or sunlight intensity,” Greene wrote. “It will be a felony offense.”

Greene added: “I have been researching weather modification and working with the legislative counsel for months writing this bill. It will be similar to Florida’s Senate Bill 56. We must end the dangerous and deadly practice of weather modification and geoengineering.”

Geoengineering is described as referring to “large or planetary-scale interventions in the Earth’s atmosphere, oceans, and soils with the intention of counteracting only some of the effects of climate change,” according to the Center for International Environmental Law. Methods of geoengineering “range from reflecting sunlight to removing carbon dioxide from the atmosphere.”

“This is not normal,” Greene continued. “I want clean air, clean skies, clean rain water, clean ground water, and sunshine just like God created it!! No person, company, entity, or government should ever be allowed to modify our weather by any means possible!!”

Breitbart News previously reported that Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (R) had spoken about Florida’s Senate Bill 56 (SB 56) prior to signing it, stating that it “protects Floridians from geoengineering and weather modification activities.”

Under the National Weather Modification Policy Act of 1976, the Secretary of Commerce is directed “to conduct a comprehensive study of the state of scientific knowledge concerning weather modification and weather modification technology.”

A Rasmussen Reports survey conducted between May 14-15, 2025, and May 18, 2025, of 1,012 likely U.S. voters found that 44 percent of likely voters in the U.S. believe that it is “likely that government agencies have been secretly releasing chemicals into the atmosphere” as part of weather modification or geoengineering.

Twenty percent expressed that it was “very likely” that weather modification and geoengineering activities were taking place, while 39 percent expressed that they don’t believe weather modification is likely.

Gas Costs Soaring In California

From New Conservative Post
If Gavin Newsom wants to be president in a few years, he’s going to need to get a handle on energy costs, but he can’t stop kowtowing to environmentalists. California’s gasoline prices are climbing once again, as a wave of new environmental regulations collides with mounting public frustration and warnings of a broader energy crisis. At the center of the storm is the state’s updated Low Carbon Fuel Standard (LCFS), which took effect Tuesday and has already triggered price increases at the pump.

Some are even warning of shortages.

The LCFS is part of Governor Gavin Newsom’s aggressive climate agenda to achieve net-zero carbon emissions by 2045, writes The Daily Caller. But critics argue that the state’s pursuit of green energy is accelerating a crisis in affordability—particularly for working-class Californians. The state already leads the nation in gasoline taxes, and its cap-and-trade system has long been linked to elevated energy costs.

California’s average price for a gallon of gas hit $4.57 on Thursday, about $1.40 above the national average, according to data from AAA. Analysts now warn that prices could spike to $8 per gallon by 2026, especially if refinery closures proceed as planned. Facilities operated by major producers like Phillips 66 and Valero are among those slated to shut down, reducing in-state refining capacity.

Energy experts and industry advocates have repeatedly cautioned that the state’s regulatory framework—intended to drive a transition to electric vehicles and renewables—risks leaving residents behind. Among the most vocal critics is Senate Minority Leader Brian Jones, who has accused Newsom and state regulators of deliberately engineering higher fuel prices to force behavioral change.

Jones, a Republican from San Diego County, has filed a formal request seeking communications between the Newsom administration and the California Air Resources Board (CARB), alleging that officials failed to fully assess the LCFS’s economic impact. CARB initially estimated a 47-cent-per-gallon increase for 2024, only to revise its projection down to five or six cents—a shift Jones described as a “defensive scramble.” Other projections place the potential hike as high as 65 cents per gallon.

The criticism goes beyond short-term price spikes. Jones has questioned the viability of California’s broader energy strategy, pointing to the state’s dependence on foreign oil imports despite vast untapped reserves within its borders. He also raised doubts about the state’s electric grid, warning that it cannot reliably support mass EV adoption, especially during periods of peak demand. “Wind and solar,” he noted, “is not going to cut it here in California.”

Calls to reverse course on the LCFS have gained momentum. Jones says a petition to repeal the changes has gathered more than 40,000 signatures. Supporters argue that the policy disproportionately burdens low- and middle-income drivers who have few transportation alternatives. Critics also note that discussions of state-owned refineries—floated as a potential stopgap—raise deeper concerns about government overreach and long-term feasibility.

Despite the mounting backlash, state officials, including Newsom, have remained largely silent. Requests for comment from CARB and the governor’s office went unanswered, even as public discontent continues to build. For now, Californians face an increasingly volatile fuel market shaped not by global supply shocks or refinery mishaps—but by the political and regulatory decisions by Democrats working in Sacramento.

The Briefs

A bear managed to close itself inside a parked car in Colorado and demolished the interior of the vehicle before being freed by a sheriff's deputy. The Jefferson County Sheriff's Office shared body camera footage recorded by a deputy summoned to a location in the foothills. "Oh, there's a bear in there," the deputy can be heard saying after peering through a window. The deputy used a rope to open the car's door from a safe distance, freeing the bear. The animal managed to completely destroy the interior of the vehicle before being set free. "Caution: Local bears may redecorate your ride," the department said on Facebook.

Firefighters were called to a stretch of interstate in Pennsylvania after a crash involving three tractor-trailers resulted in mozzarella cheese being spilled across a 200-yard area. The Snow Shoe Fire Company said on social media that the Pennsylvania State Police notified Clearfield County that a crash had occurred at mile marker 145 on eastbound Interstate 80, leaving a debris field covering an area of about 200 yards. Firefighters arrived on scene and determined that one of the trucks had been "hauling boxes of shredded mozzarella cheese" and "was split wide open with debris all over the roadway." The Pennsylvania Department of Transportation had the area of the road shut down for clean-up operations. Fire officials said they determined no hazmat response was needed, but "all cheese will be headed to the landfill as the load was deemed unsalvageable due to being unrefrigerated for hours."

The South Carolina Highway Patrol shared video of two troopers chasing a loose pig found running through traffic on a busy stretch of highway. The video, posted to Facebook, shows two troopers engaged in a hoof pursuit with the oinking fugitive in the middle of Interstate 26 in Chapin. The highway patrol said I-26 is "one of the state's busiest interstates." "Thankfully, after a short foot chase, the pig was rescued without injury and the troopers were able to get traffic moving again," the post said. "Thanks to Richland County Sheriff's Department for their assistance at the scene and helping ensure this little piggy had a good home after the incident."

A Virginia Tech study concluded that large solar projects increase the property value of farmland around the solar installations but reduces the value of homes in the community. This is probably contributing to the growing objections to large solar projects around Virginia.

A French firefighter with an unlikely talent for setting himself on fire has claimed his third world record in a daring blaze of glory. Jonathan Vero rode 442.10 m (1,450 ft) while he was aflame to set the record for farthest distance full body burn while riding a motorcycle. He claimed this new record on his modified Yamaha DragStar 1100 in Côte d'Or, France, in May, but he already had two others. On 10 September 2022, Jonathan set the fastest full body burn 100 m sprint without oxygen in 17 seconds and the longest distance full body burn run without oxygen with 272.25 m (893 ft 2.5 in).

The final passed Big Beautiful Bill ended or made more difficult, most offshore wind and other large scale renewable projects, but not Dominion’s Coastal Virginia Offshore Wind project (CVOW), which was allowed to continue. As explained by our Steve Haner on Virginia Public Radio, stranding $6 billion on ratepayers to repay to Dominion would have been unfair, a point Governor Youngkin was sure to have made to the President. With the project on still on track, $28 million in state grants will help subsidize a manufacturing project for underwater cable to help bring this energy to shore.

A new “Blue Envelope” program is being deployed at DMVs across the Commonwealth to allow drivers diagnosed on the Autism Spectrum to have a blue envelope to present to police officers when they are stopped to let them know of their autism, which will then prompt police to have that in their mind while interacting with the card holder. This seems wise, but, I fear could be easily abused. But what about the deaf: Police Brutality and Deaf People

A man has been arrested after an "extreme act of violence" at a dragstrip in Colonial Beach left a man critically injured on Saturday night. Deputies received a report of a shooting during Nanu’s Bikefest at Custom T’s Motorsports Park at 8 p.m., according to Capt. Chris Smith with the Westmoreland County Sheriff’s Office. "When deputies arrived, they found one male victim suffering from a gunshot wound," officials said. The 52-year-old victim was taken to Mary Washington Hospital with life-threatening injuries, Sheriff C.O. Balderson said Sunday. Forty-seven-year-old Dwayne Newman was arrested and charged with malicious wounding and use of a firearm during the commission of a felony, Balderson said. Newman is being held without bond and is scheduled to be arraigned, officials said. Officials with Custom T’s Motorsports Park said they were saddened by the violence at the event, which they have hosted without incident for more than 13 years. Park officials said they were grateful for everyone who worked to save the victim and those who helped ID the suspect. Yesterday evening during Nanu’s Bikefest, an extremely violent person committed an extreme act of violence, disrupting an event that had been proudly and peacefully hosted at our raceway in Colonial Beach for over 13 years without incident. We don’t know what motivated him to do such an evil thing. What we do know is that thanks to our safety and security staff, along with local law enforcement and emergency services, the victim is alive and the subject is in custody. We are deeply grateful to everyone who worked diligently to save the victim’s life and to assist law enforcement in identifying the subject. Our hearts go out to the victim and their loved ones during this incredibly difficult time. Custom T’s Motorsports Park

Man rescues baby left on church steps in sweltering heat after carjacking, finds family on Facebook live - Earl Abernathy in Chicago spotted a baby while driving. He stopped and posted the baby on Facebook the baby’s grandmother, Karen Whittington, ended up joining the Facebook live, and she and other family members let him know that the girl was their relative. “We were all out of our minds,” a frantic but grateful Whittington told the Sun-Times in a text message Tuesday. “Well, everyone is OK, and we [are] glad she’s found,” Whittington said. Abernathy turned the girl over to police once they arrived at the scene. She was later reunited with her family. As it turns out, the infant had been in the back seat of a vehicle that was stolen from a Lawndale gas station earlier Thursday morning, police said. Jeremy Ochoa allegedly stole the car and then left the baby outside the church. Ochoa, 38, now faces aggravated kidnapping and vehicular hijacking charges.

MSN reported on July 2 that a Tesla in "self-driving mode" tried to mix it up with a train in mid-June in Sinking Spring, Pennsylvania. Western Berks Fire Commissioner Jared Renshaw said the vehicle turned left onto some train tracks; the three people inside the car were able to get out and gather their belongings before a train came along an adjacent track a few minutes later. The Tesla suffered only a damaged mirror, but it had to be lifted with a crane off the tracks so as not to disturb its highly flammable battery. "We've had accidents involving Teslas," Renshaw said, "but nobody has expressed to us that the vehicle was in self-drive mode when it happened."

Raleigh, North Carolina, police were called to the scene of a robbery on July 1, WRAL-TV reported. Victims told officers that a naked man with a wooden post approached them and demanded access to their car. The man also assaulted a woman sitting in her car, hitting her on the arm with the post. He then tried to drive away but couldn't shift the car out of park. He fled and hid in a storage room before being captured and taken into custody. Police didn't release the names of the victims or the suspect.

Police in Portland, Oregon, finally caught up with a man who had fired gunshots at them and led them on a high-speed chase on June 20, KATU-TV reported. The Milwaukie Police Department said they took Loony John Franklin Toon, 42, into custody on June 23 and charged him with first-degree attempted murder, first-degree assault and fleeing from the police. That's all, folks!

On June 19 in Silver Creek, Minnesota, a car that was "swerving and weaving" hit a curb and careened into a scissor lift, which workers were using to fix a light. The New York Post reported that the car then slammed into a tunnel wall and flipped. One worker, Benjamin Kidd, 27, sustained life-threatening injuries; another managed to hang on to the light fixture until first responders could help him down. Driving the car was none other than Patches Magickbeans, 34, of Wisconsin, who was allegedly intoxicated; police said he was babbling and reaching for objects in the air that weren't there. Officers found psilocybin mushrooms in his car. Magickbeans' bio on his Instagram page says he is a "womb wisdom keeper" and "corn juggler."

Ford Motor is recalling 850,318 Ford and Lincoln models because the vehicles' low-pressure fuel pump may fail while in use, causing the engine to stall, according to a notice filed with the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration. "Affected vehicles may lose fuel pressure and flow from the fuel tank due to failure of the low-pressure fuel pump. This can cause a lack of fuel delivery to the engine and result in an engine stall. An engine stall while driving increases the risk of a crash," the July 8 recall notice states. Warnings of imminent pump failure include poor engine performance, such as "misfiring or running rough," or a reduction in engine power, according to Ford. Drivers of affected cars may also see a "check engine" light. "Fuel pump failure is more likely to occur under low fuel or warm weather and hot fuel conditions in the fuel tank," Ford noted. The automaker isn't aware of any injuries related to the fuel-pump failure. The recall affects the following Ford and Lincoln models: Ford:
2021-2022 F-150, Mustang
2021-2023 Bronco, Explorer, F-250 SD, F-350 SD, F-450 SD, F-550 SD
2022 Expedition
Lincoln:
2021-2022 Navigator
2021-2023 Aviator

The first federal jury trial against Tesla began in a Miami court on July 14 involving its Autopilot driver-assistance system, designed to perform basic maneuvers and alert drivers to upcoming obstacles. Most previous lawsuits against Tesla were either dismissed or settled out of court.  The case centers on a 2019 crash in which a man was driving his Tesla Model S with Autopilot engaged (see how it works). As he bent to retrieve a dropped phone, the Tesla hit a parked SUV, killing 22-year-old Naibel Benavides Leon and severely injuring her boyfriend, Dillon Angulo. Benavides' family and Angulo are pursuing punitive damages against Tesla, alleging Autopilot malfunctioned and Tesla overpromised drivers about the technology’s capabilities. Tesla’s lawyers are expected to argue the driver was responsible for ??supervising the system and present data showing his foot was on the accelerator before the crash.  The trial comes as Tesla aims to expand its self-driving taxi service nationwide and faces a second year of declining sales, with last quarter’s deliveries falling 13.5% year over year.

General Motors says Q2 earnings took a $1.1B hit from new tariffs on imported cars and auto parts, shrinking net income by 35% year over year; America's largest automaker still beat Wall Street estimates on Q2 earnings and revenue.

This was a rough week for the collective cultural psyche of Gen Xers. We lost Malcom-Jamal Warner, TV’s lovable Theo Huxtable. We lost Ozzy Osbourne, the Prince of Darkness. We lost Chuck Mangione, the Grammy-winning jazz horn player. And we lost Terry Bollea, better known as Hulk Hogan. Of that powerhouse quartet, only one that we know of ever consigned a Hulkster-themed Dodge Viper to auction. At Mecum’s mega Kissimmee sale in 2020, Hulkamania ran wild when Hogan’s red and yellow custom 1994 RT/10 crossed the block. Hulk Hogan had his enemies inside the ring, and he certainly had his critics outside of it, but the Viper was consigned as a charity lot, with all proceeds to benefit the 50 Legs Foundation, which provided care and prosthetics to amputees. At the time, RT/10s in #3 (good) condition were valued at around $27,000, with #2 (excellent) ones at about $40K, and best-in-the-world #1 examples hovering at $60K. When the hammer fell on Hulk’s 400-hp machine (which, let’s face it, with a few minor graphical changes could also have worked quite well as Ronald McDonald’s chariot of choice, such was their shared palette), Mecum recorded a stellar $82,500 result.

Emissions Rule Rollback?
The Environmental Protection Agency yesterday (7/29) proposed repealing a 2009 "endangerment finding" that declared six key greenhouse gases, including carbon dioxide, to be a threat to public health and welfare. The regulation underpins a range of emissions standards affecting motor vehicles, power plants, and oil and gas operations. The "endangerment finding" was established following a Supreme Court decision recognizing greenhouse gases as air pollutants under the Clean Air Act. The legal foundation enabled the EPA to set emissions restrictions, including a rule finalized last year that limits tailpipe emissions from passenger cars and light trucks. The transportation sector is the largest source of US greenhouse gases.   The proposal kicks off a 90-day public comment period. Environmental advocates warn repealing the finding would undermine efforts to address climate change and increase risks to the environment by allowing higher pollution levels. Industry groups welcomed the proposed rollback, claiming annual consumer savings of up to $54B.

Repair Mistakes & Blunders

From Rock Auto
One crisp fall evening, I sauntered into my garage, ready to tackle a routine brake job on my beloved 2014 Cadillac ATS. I've done this dance countless times, so I slipped into my coveralls and cranked up some classic rock to set the mood. Everything was going smoothly until I fumbled a caliper bracket bolt. "No biggie," I thought, "I'll grab it during reassembly."

Fast forward to reassembly, and that bolt had pulled a Houdini. Poof! Gone. I searched high and low - under the jack, around the jack stands, even in the nooks of the control arm, thinking it might be playing hide-and-seek. I checked my coverall pockets, wondering if I'd actually picked it up at some point and stashed it. Nothing. I was one step away from calling a priest to exorcise my garage or a physicist to check for wormholes. That bolt had clearly moved into another dimension.

Just as I was about to lose my marbles, my saint of a wife called me in for dinner. Her cooking is worth pausing any existential crisis for, so I started peeling off my coveralls to avoid tracking grease into the house. And then — *clink!* — something hit the floor. I looked down, and there it was: the runaway caliper bolt, smirking up at me from the garage floor. Turns out, my too-long coveralls had rolled-up cuffs that doubled as a secret bolt hideout. The little rascal had slipped in there, silent as a ninja, drowned out by my blaring tunes.

Thanks to my wife's impeccable dinner timing, I was saved from a full-blown garage meltdown.

Mike in Ontario, Canada

Gas Prices Are Expected To Fall: ‘It’s going to be the cheapest summer since 2021,’ One Expert Says

From CNBC
This summer could bring the lowest gas prices in years, and the national average price of gas could fall below $3 a gallon as early as September, says Patrick De Haan, head of petroleum analysis at GasBuddy.

"It's going to be the cheapest summer since 2021, when the economy was heavily influenced by Covid," De Haan says.

As of Tuesday, the national average for a gallon of gas in the U.S. was $3.21, up roughly 10 cents from two weeks ago, according to the U.S. Energy Information Administration.

The spike was largely driven by a jump in oil prices due to the Israel-Iran conflict in the Middle East, but now that both countries have agreed to a ceasefire, De Haan says he expects prices to steeply fall and then resume their "slow decline" over the course of the summer.

Typically, gas prices tend to drop throughout the summer due to various factors that increase the supply of gas, De Haan says. That includes jolts to gas prices from the switch to a more expensive summer blend of gasoline leveling off, refineries increasing production and consumer demand softening after early summer travel peaks.

"Obviously the Middle East situation is an exception, but now that this is, seemingly for now, in de-escalation, gas prices should resume their slow decline over the course of the summer," De Haan says.

Gas is the cheapest it's ever been
Adjusted for inflation, gas prices are near the lowest levels we've seen in the last 20 years, De Haan says. The typical American uses about 3% of their income to fill up their tank every year, De Haan says, whether it's with gasoline or diesel.

Due to rising incomes, "Americans are actually spending far less of their income on energy than they have in quite some time," De Haan says.

Year over year, the price of gas is down 12%, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics' most recent Consumer Price Index report released earlier in June. This is largely due to fears that the U.S. economy is slowing down and an increase in supply of oil from a group of oil-producing nations known OPEC+, CNBC reported in May.

Shocks will be temporary
Ultimately, De Haan says it's important to remember that most shocks will be temporary. The price of gas is mostly determined by the market for oil, which is constantly reacting to global events — so just as quickly as prices rise, they will often fall once the disruption passes.

"Every event that's ever affected us from a pipeline outage … to major hurricanes that impact gas prices, all these events are temporary," De Haan says. "The world is changing every day. It's not always for the worst."

1969 AMC Rebel Commercial

First Virginia Buc-ee's Opens With Over 100 Gas Pumps And 70,000 Square Foot Store

From: 6 News Richmond
Virginia welcomed its first Buc-ee's travel center today as the Texas-based chain opened its doors in Mount Crawford.

Located near mile marker 240 on Interstate 81, the massive facility features more than 100 gas pumps and a 70,000 square foot store.

Customers can find everything from the chain's famous barbecue and jerky to unique gifts and souvenirs.

Buc-ee's has built a cult following thanks to its spotlessly clean bathrooms and exceptional customer service.

"Buc-ee's is a lifestyle, Buc-ee's is family, Buc-ee's is friends. Buc-ee's is also a family travel center. We're going to put together all that love and that fun into stopping for gas on that road trip right here in Virginia," a company representative said.

The grand opening ceremony kicked off Monday at 10 a.m., with the company's beaver mascot on hand for photos.

American Battlefield Trust and Pamplin Park Announce Campaign to Preserve Breakthrough Battlefield

Trust will acquire and conserve the 417-acre Pamplin Park campus and its historic features, and allow for the continued, long-term operation of the popular museum and living history classroom - Important information on the site for our annual car show.
The American Battlefield Trust is embarking on one of the largest preservation projects in its history, a national fundraising campaign that will result in an 857-acre protected swath of land associated with one of the Civil War’s most significant battlefields. The 417 acres currently owned by Pamplin Historical Park and the National Museum of the Civil War Soldier have been enjoyed and appreciated for decades by heritage tourists and countless school students, but until now has not been fully protected for future generations.

The Trust has agreed to acquire the property for $11 million. Thanks to anticipated matching grant funding from the federal American Battlefield Protection Program, which has helped protect approximately 35,000 acres of hallowed ground across 20 states, and a major landowner donation, the Trust is seeking to raise $660,000 by year-end to complete the transaction. Learn more at www.battlefields.org/breakthrough.

“There is no denying that this is an ambitious undertaking,” said American Battlefield Trust President David Duncan, “We begin the endeavor with the conviction that our members will rise to the occasion and the certainty that future generations will be enriched by the permanent protection of this incredible landscape.”

“This process will not only secure the battlefield for all time, but proceeds from the sale will create an investment fund that will finance the new Breakthrough Battlefield Foundation and enable Pamplin to continue operations in perpetuity,” said Colin Romanick, executive director of Pamplin Historical Park & The National Museum of the Civil War Soldier.

Following a nine-month siege, the Union Army of the Potomac launched a massive assault on the Southern defenses southwest of Petersburg, Va., on April 2, 1865, an attack remembered by history as “The Breakthrough” for breaking those lines clearing the road to the Confederate capital at Richmond. Within weeks, the Civil War was over.

Through a series of transactions over the course of 30 years, the Trust has acquired 439 acres associated with the Union advance and gradually restored them to their wartime appearance by removing modern buildings and other intrusions. Meanwhile, the contiguous Pamplin campus occupies a significant section of the Confederate line and includes two miles of pristine earthworks. Acquisition by the Trust and establishment of a long-term agreement with the newly formed Breakthrough Battlefield Foundation will play to both entities’ strengths: historic landscape preservation and immersive educational experiences, respectively. It will also create improved interpretive and recreational opportunities by unifying trail systems.

The campus was assembled in phases through purchases made by businessman and philanthropist Dr. Robert B. Pamplin, Jr., beginning in the early 1990s when the Association for the Preservation of Civil War Sites, a predecessor of the American Battlefield Trust, alerted him of a development threat to land once owned by his family. Pamplin went on to acquire adjacent parcels, including Tudor Hall, the plantation home of his ancestors, and Banks House, Ulysses S. Grant’s headquarters on April 2-3, 1865. The 25,000 square-foot National Museum of the Civil War Soldier opened on Memorial Day 1999 and the park was named a National Historic Landmark in 2006.

“I'm absolutely delighted that the Trust and Pamplin Historical Park have combined to ensure that this important educational facility will be preserved forever and continue to inspire tens of thousands of visitors each year,” said A. Wilson Greene, a founder of the Trust’s predecessor organization who went on to serve as the executive director of Pamplin Park from its opening until his retirement in 2017.

Fighting at The Breakthrough was intense — sometimes hand-to-hand — and climactic, resulting in perhaps the greatest concentration of Medals of Honor ever awarded. Researchers at the Congressional Medal of Honor Society believe that 31 Medal citation actions occurred across the now-combined site, which also witnessed subsequent assaults on Fort Gregg and Fort Whitworth and further medals.

“This battlefield is where courage met consequence,” said Congressional Medal of Honor Society President Britt Slabinski, who received the Medal during the Global War on Terrorism, Afghanistan. “The men who fought here embodied duty: in the dirt, under fire, when everything was on the line. This ground speaks plainly about what courage truly looks like. By preserving it, we give future generations the chance to stand where they stood, carry the weight they bore, and grasp the true cost of service. This is how we honor them — not just with words, but by protecting the very place where their legacy was forged.”

To learn more about the fighting at the Breakthrough or make a gift to this remarkable opportunity to ensure this hallowed ground is protected forever, visit www.battlefields.org/breakthrough.

The American Battlefield Trust is dedicated to preserving America’s hallowed battlegrounds and educating the public about what happened there and why it matters today. The nonprofit, nonpartisan organization has protected more than 60,000 acres associated with the Revolutionary War, War of 1812 and Civil War. Learn more at www.battlefields.org.

105-year-old Stolen Rolls Royce Found

From MSN
A beloved vintage Rolls Royce has been returned to its owner three days after it was stolen ahead of a European tour.

The 1920 Silver Ghost, valued at more than £300,000, had been secured to a trailer in the grounds of a hotel near Grays, Essex, on 26 June.

Her owner, Brian Fitton, 82, was preparing to travel to Tilbury Docks and on to Helsinki in Finland. Essex Police said the car was found intact, on the trailer.

Mr Fitton thanked the public for their support in reuniting him with his "pride and joy".

Mr Fitton had been preparing to take the car to Tilbury Docks ahead of the ferry trip to Helsinki, Finland.

Mr Fitton said he had travelled the world in the car for the past 25 years.

"I was staying at a local hotel and was shocked to find my beautiful car missing the following morning," he said.

"The route included touring Finland, Sweden, Latvia and Estonia before returning to the UK at the end of the month."

Essex police district commander Tony Atkin added: "We know how distressing it is to have your car stolen whether it's a vintage car, a van used for business or a car to do the school run.

"That's why we take every report seriously and work hard to recover stolen vehicles quickly."

Preorders for Ram’s Revived Hemi Show Big Demand

From Hagerty
When Ram announced the return of the 5.7-liter Hemi V-8 to its light-duty pickup early last month, we figured it would prove popular with potential buyers. Now, thanks to a recent Stellantis release detailing Q2 sales results, we have some numbers to show just how well-received the move was.

According to Ram, within 24 hours of the June 5 announcement detailing the Hemi’s return to the light-duty lineup, the truck builder received more than 10,000 preorders for the eight-pot pickup. Customers do indeed enjoy freedom of choice (and choosing a V-8), it would seem.

Ram brand CEO Tim Kuniskis noted at the announcement that the company expected the take rate for the Hemi V-8 to land somewhere between 25 and 40 percent. If we take Ram’s stated number of light-duty deliveries in Q2, which was 51,848, the preorders suggest a take rate slightly below 20 percent as of right now. However, we’d expect that number to climb as the trucks become available on dealer lots.

Those Hemi-powered Rams are going to be loud and proud—on a few levels. Each new Hemi-powered Ram 1500 will get a fender-mounted “Symbol of Protest Badge” on it, depicting the Ram head logo attached to the meaty block of a Hemi V-8. Along with the stylistic treatment, all those V-8-powered Rams will also come equipped with the GT Sport exhaust as standard, so they’re going to be rowdy right from the factory—certainly intentional on Ram’s part, and something we suspect buyers will enjoy.

Now, it bears repeating: The Hemi-powered Ram 1500 isn’t the most capable of the lineup, despite its 395 hp and 410 lb-ft ratings. Rams equipped with both versions of the Hurricane twin-turbo inline-six, the standard-output and the high-output version, still clip the Hemi in terms of horsepower and torque (420 hp and 469 lb-ft and 540 hp and 521 lb-ft, respectively). Hemi-equipped Rams can tow up to 11,470 lbs, while payload ratings stretch as high as 1750 lbs. Hurricane-equipped Rams best these figures—towing tops out at 11,600 lbs, and payload gets as high as 2360 lbs.

Still, in the same way that manual transmissions have been supplanted by automatics when it comes to outright performance, yet we love them anyway, the Hemi V-8 will remain the emotional choice for Ram light-duty truck buyers. And we’re more than cool with that.

Tales From Yesterday

In my junior year of high school, this guy asked me on a date. He rented a Redbox movie and made a pizza. We were watching the movie and the oven beeped so the pizza was done. He looked me dead in the eye and said, “This is the worst part.” I then watched this boy open the oven and pull the pizza out with his bare hands, rack and all, screaming at the top of his lungs. We never had a second date.

I failed the first quarter of a class in middle school, so I made a fake report card. I did this every quarter that year. I forgot that they mail home the end-of-year cards, and my mom got it before I could intercept with my fake. She was PISSED—at the school for their error. The teacher also retired that year and had already thrown out his records, so they had to take my mother’s “proof” (the fake ones I made throughout the year) and “correct” the “mistake.” I’ve never told her the truth.

One time my drama class’s teacher had gone home sick so we were just put in a classroom with a movie to entertain us for the period when an alarm went off. None of us were sure if it was the fire alarm or the lockdown alarm, so we all head out into the hall to check and no one’s out there, so we head back in and climb under our desks as is lockdown procedure. Cut to an hour or so later when a teacher bursts in and nearly dies of relief because the school was on fire and we were the only students not accounted for and half the faculty and fire department had been searching for us for ages. Literally, the whole school had filled with smoke while we’d kept super safe under our wooden desks.

During my sophomore year of high school, we were doing silent work and my history teacher said that we could listen to music but if it was too loud he would “break our headphones.” so I’m doing my work quietly with my music on low, and this obnoxious kid sitting next to me had his music really loud. I could hear it over my music but ignored it. My teacher thought it was me. So he comes up to me & ripped my BRAND NEW Apple headphones, looking ruthless. He suddenly realized it was the guy next to me and he was completely embarrassed. He came in the next day with a new pair and an apology note taped to them. He couldn’t look me in the eye for the rest of the year.

I have a friend who I’ve known since I was very little. One day, when he was six, I was at his house when he got this absolutely god-awful stomach pain. I mean, he was literally writhing in pain. So, his mom took him to the doctor’s office, where the doctor took one look and told her to take him to the ER. She feared something along the lines of an intestinal rupture. About half way to the hospital, my friend suddenly let rip the loudest, most powerful fart any of us had ever heard. I swear to God he levitated. We thought the upholstery in the car seat had ripped. After a good 30 seconds of intense farting, he looked at his mom and said, “I feel all better now!”

So my oldest brother Ethan doesn’t like wearing pants while at home, he wears boxers (because he’s a gentleman) but REFUSES to wear pants. So one day we’re all just chilling on the couch when Ethan comes in wearing his boxers. My younger brother Eric asks if he can take off his pants too and Ethan says yeah, just make sure you have clean underwear on. Eric leaves the room, goes upstairs, comes back 3 or 4 minutes later without pants in my underwear, and not just any underwear; Victoria’s Secret, MY VICTORIA’S SECRET (only girl in the family). Ethan is laughing his ass off, Nate (next oldest brother) is rolling on the floor, and I’m just sitting there like WTF. My dad chooses the best time to come in with guests, when one of his 10 year old sons is standing in the living room wearing his only daughters frilly Victoria’s Secrets, his oldest isn’t wearing pants, and the other two sons are on the floor dying. The neighbors haven’t come over since.

One time in my chemistry class, while the teacher was talking, this guy asked loudly, “Does anyone have any lotion?” The teacher stopped talking as some girl gave him some hand lotion. The guy proceeds to slowly rub the lotion on his face as the whole class watches him in confusion. The teacher asks him what he’s doing, and he responds with “I forgot to moisturize this morning” and puts even more on his face. The teacher asks him to go to the hall to finish his moisturizing because he’s being a distraction, and after about 10 minutes he still hasn’t come back in, so someone opens the door to check and he’s still smearing lotion all over his face. He finally comes back in and hands the girl her lotion, and he’s used up half of it. Now people call him lotion boy.

So in my junior year of high school I got a project to make a roller coaster for my physics class. Everything was going fine until the day my partner and I had to paint the thing. We were in my garage spray painting the tubes and these two guys come marching up to the house across the street and start yelling at the top of their lungs, beating on the door. Now let me say in my defense the neighborhood I lived in was in south Dallas and it’s still not a safe place. Well I called the police, closed the garage and parked myself in front of the dining room window. Long story short the police showed up in full gear broke down the door and brought out the two boys at gunpoint. And that’s the story of how my entire block found out that the abandoned house had new owners.

In fifth grade, my teacher loathed me. She would do anything to make me cry and sent me to the principal’s office any chance she got. Don’t believe me? I’m left handed. So still, to this day, I get my hands confused. On this particular day, we were doing the Pledge of Allegiance and I had put my left hand to my chest (it’s supposed to be your right hand over your heart). She got mad at me, telling me that I wasn’t being ‘patriotic’ and sent me to the principal’s office. The principal and I were quite acquainted at this point and so I told her why I was sent back to her office again, and she laughed. And laughed. I didn’t find it funny at all, I mean all the kids in my school thought I was a delinquent so they didn’t want to be my friend. My principal wrote on the back of my hands, L and R. What I didn’t realize was that she wrote L on my right hand and R on my left hand. She did the same to hers. Then, she walked me back to the classroom, and made our whole class redo the Pledge with our ‘right’ hand, with me leading the class, and it was one of the happiest moments of my elementary experience.

So I was sitting at a lecture when I feel like being stared at, and in the corner of my eye I see this really handsome guy, who’s literally just staring at me. I don’t think much of it and continue to listen to the professor. After the lecture the guy comes up to me, and lays his hand on head and I’m like “eeeehm, what are you doing” and he stares me dead in the eyes and says “I’ve never seen such a gorgeous skull” and then he turns around and leaves.

I took Chinese at school as a freshman. On one particular day, we didn’t have anything to do in class since we had gone through the whole curriculum for the semester. Our teacher wanted us to watch a Chinese movie in that free time, and I just so happened to watch one recently on YouTube. I offered to find it, and my teacher let me use her computer, that was connected to a Promethean board so that the whole class could see what I was doing on the screen. After a couple of minutes of searching, I couldn’t find the movie since I didn’t know the exact title, so I logged into my YouTube account and decided to find it in my history. When I opened my history I was mortified since stupid me had forgotten that being the awkward virgin that I was at the time I had searched up tutorials on kissing and making out that previous night. The whole class was hysterically laughing, my teacher was extremely confused, and I almost cried as I scrolled past all the kissing tutorials and finally found the movie. I went back to my seat and didn’t speak to anyone in class for the rest of the week. I still haven’t lived it down.

A couple years ago my friends and I were going to see a movie in the theatre at the mall. Instead of paying the ridiculous movie theatre prices for pop and candy, we decided to go to target to buy some stuff. This was when Coca Cola started to put people’s names on their bottles. My friend told me she had seen a bottle with my name on it inside this bin of Coke. I was weirdly excited since I hadn’t gotten one with my name on it yet. After I had bought the drink, I opened inside target, and it exploded EVERYWHERE. The pop was at least five or six feet in diameter. I watched as people passed the mess and made looks of disgust. Imagine if I had opened it inside of the theatre…

One day when I was 3 I decided I wanted to be like my mom and wear “big girl” panties. I sneakily went through her drawer and grabbed the first thing I could find – a thong (I didn’t know what it was at the time). She didn’t know until we went to breakfast with some friends and took me to the bathroom. She still won’t let me live it down!

I have decided to remain anonymous to protect my identity from the foolishness. last night, I became hungry and decided to make some ramen. I removed the various packets from the bowl, added the flavor and vegetables, then put the bowl in the microwave. After about a minute or two, I realized something was wrong. A terrible burning smell had filled my kitchen. I opened the door to my microwave and…low and behold…I had neglected to add water. There was some smoke coming from the bowl. Not wanting to waste the ramen, I went to the sink and added water, which filled the room in acrid smoke for several seconds. I then returned the bowl to the microwave and cooked it for two more minutes before attempting to eat it. Well….It went okay for a little while, until I discovered a globule of blackened noodles which had turned into some sort of strange crystalline substance yet seen in nature by humankind. I had a change of heart.

So I was at the local DMV to get my driver’s license when my dad pissed off the lady at the counter. turns out she was the lady that had to do the actual road test with me. We get in the car and I thought I was doing pretty well, until she starts freaking out? She has me pull over, tells me I’m the worst driver ever. after yelling at me, she demands I go back to the DMV. and the rest of the time she is on her phone. When we get there, there is a state trooper waiting for me. gives me a field sobriety test. Literally had to take a sobriety test when I tried to get my license. At least I passed one test that day.

So about a year ago, I was in Phys. Ed class, and we went around the neighborhood for a jog at the beginning of each class. I hadn’t done it before because of medical reasons, but the teacher evidently forgot about it. I’m incredibly bad with directions and easily distracted, so I lost sight of the rest of the group and went completely the wrong way. I ended up being lost for TWO AND A HALF HOURS. the best part is that I single handedly changed my school’s Phys. Ed policy.

I used to babysit this little boy who was a real handful. He was always in trouble and it seemed like every time his dad had to call him it went like this… Dad finds disaster left by Adam. Dad yells out, “Son of a Bitch! Adam!” One day I have to pick up Adam’s older brother at school. A Catholic school. His teacher, a nun, sees adorable little Adam with his chubby cheeks and face like a cherub and asks him his name and he answers flat out, “SonofabitchAdam.”

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